Friday, 4 September 2015

Feminism Is Pretty Much Sexism



Note: I’m blogging for the India Today Woman Summit 2015 #WomenPower activity at BlogAdda. That said, I am not going to focus my attention on women that have been really subjugated by patriarchy in the various corners of the country. I am talking about the hardcore feminists here because frankly, these are not women who have themselves undergone the cruelties of child marriage or female illiteracy or female infanticide or the likes for that matter. These are the cause and effect generation of women who are going to shape the future of India. But there are problems with what they believe and what they want. What are these? As a man, or as the rigid feminists like to call us- a sexist hog and a tool of patriarchy, I happen to know them and the differences that give rise to these problems. I am going to tell you about them here. But would you like them?

As a generation today,women have succumbed themselves to the altar of something, the name of which, you don't usually find in dictionaries and that is misandry. Strangely enough, misandry is everywhere-from fiction to films, from news to views, and even in the day to day civic life. It is more of a Cyclops syndrome where only one aspect of the problem is taken into picture and ideologies are woven with rigid obstinacy.

Cyclops people stereotype the male by the actions of a minority and define the exceptions as the rule. In CBS news's nationwide survey conducted in USA, when women were asked "Do you consider yourself to be a feminist or not?" -only 24 percent identified themselves as so while 17 percent thought the term was an insult! But when they were given a definition viz "A feminist is someone who believes in social, political, and economic equality of the sexes. Do you think of yourself as a feminist now?" -the number shot to 64 percent considering themselves feminists!!! Now what's this paradox? It is because women who do as well as who do not identify themselves as feminists seem to attach a certain 'militant drive' and 'chip on the shoulder' attitude with the word. These are the implications and the repercussions of an ideologically driven, theoretically unsound, and empirically unsupported perspective of Feminism.

Women whine about how terrible their lives are and relate anything and everything bad they face to gender inequality considering "it is just because I am a girl" which is far from truth. Each one of us all, regardless of gender have to face things in life. Albeit, there is no denying that cruelty and pain has been afflicted in certain cases by men upon the fairer sex but yet again it is not to be forgotten that most murderers are male but most males are not murderers. But hey..MISANDRY SELLS..like completely.. I see girls wearing slogans like -"so many boys, so little ammunition", "dead men don't rape"(well..nor do most of men),"boys are smelly, throw stones at them"..and my personal favourite "what do you call a boy with half a brain?-gifted" --Now these are statements that may create havoc were the sexes reversed.

There seems to be too much DEMONIZATION OF THE MALE SEX. There is even hate literature- 'The Color purple' by Alice Walker is totally misandric and the 'action' taken in this regard was her being awarded with a Pulitzer! Betty Friedan, referred to suburban domestic life as a "comfortable concentration camp" for women, and their husbands as SS prison guards. Rosalind Miles described men as "the death sex." Valerie Solanas wrote "The SCUM Manifesto", the Society for Cutting Up Men!! To add to this hate culture there have been comments by Feminists, for example by Germaine Greer like when she said that British troops would rape women while at war..!! and the ever so bizarre one whereby On the BBC show Question Time, she said that young girls could be sexualised by "kissing their fathers goodnight" which generated much criticism and rightly so. To paraphrase New Jersey philosopher J. B. Jovi, they give feminism a bad name.

Women talk about Marissa Mayer, the CEO of Yahoo .A woman (from Silicon Valley, no less) enters the ranks of Fortune 500 CEOs -- that elite, all-powerful, nearly 4% female club... BUT SHE SAYS SHE DOESN'T THINK SHE WOULD CONSIDER HERSELF A FEMINIST!!! WHAT DOES THIS CONVEY EXCEPT THE NAKED TRUTH THAT FEMINISM HAS BECOME SEXISM TODAY?

It's as if women themselves seem to think "If I am a woman,I'm a lowly creature, but if I say I'm a feminist, I get to kick some a**"

A few days ago as I was watching a Shinchan movie (Yup..I still do), there came a twist where they had to show that everything in the world had become its exact opposite. And so, among many other things, there was a scene where there is a 'reserved for men' train compartment and one man says to another- "Hell Yeah, Now that's for equality". Let me tell you what exactly feminists want, something for which they haven't yet been able to draw a sentence for and that is (quote) Equality- Political, Economical, BUT NOT Social... period... (unquote).

YESSS..that's precisely what women want; They want to be treated as equals in the economic sphere, have equal opportunities for growth, equal pays and equal access to tools that make them achieve it. Plus, they want to yield same amount of power as men do (even if it is detrimental to the very essence of equality i.e. via reservations and all). Well for once, fair enough, albeit there are instances where women (and i am talking about actual personalities who actually yield power in the country) have agreed that they would deem it a better situation if they were to work with a more capable male than a less able person of the fairer sex. Now coming to the real issue- Why not social equality?

You see, women always have had this penchant "to be heard". Though it's in everyone's nature, but in women it is much more prominent or pronounced. So it's like they think  (*read in the prototypical six year old girl tone*)

"Yes I want equality but in the social sphere, I 'aspire' to be treated like a doll, to be pampered and I also want the upper hand whenever I desire".

It's like they want society to respect their 'feminine side' and to attend to it while they detest the same elsewhere. I say- Why these double standards? Why this call for special benefits? And mind you, this demand wouldn't subside even if women gain all power and pace, money and fame, pomp and show they want. No it wouldn't. They will always have this- "I am a woman and so you gotta respect me(period) No matter what" attitude.

Well, the thought defies reasoning but is true to the core. Quoting Mr.Viru Sahastrabuddhe from 'Three idiots'-"Let me give you a very interesting example"-

When I was in class 11, I used to attend coaching classes right after school and it was like 20 kms. (in my city, it 'is' a distance) from my home and had to wait for a city bus too. Allow me to tell you how badly I love buses.. I mean it's the most perfect place to learn many of life lessons. So after leaving home at 7am, when I finally took a bus home at 8.30pm, a familiar spectacle was after me (It's so crowded you pray to God that you get space to stand). By some luck, I could manage to 'jump' on a seat as someone just left. A minute later, a girl of 22-23 (Yes, I'm real good at guessing age) asked me to vacate the seat for her!!

NOW  HERE  WAS  THE  PERFECT  EXAMPLE  OF  THE  PROTOTYPE  OF  A  SOCIETY  WHERE  YOU  ARE  NEITHER  A  KING  NOR  A  BEGGAR,  BUT  A  PASSENGER  AND  YOU  BUY  THE  SAME  TICKET.  SO  ECONOMIC  EQUALITY  DONE  WITH.  NOW  THERE  ARE  RESERVED  SEATS  FOR  MP'S  &  MLA'S  BUT  OBVIOUSLY  THEY  DON'T  TRAVEL  BY  BUS (THAT'S  FOR  POLITICAL).  NOW  COMES  THE  SOCIAL  STRATA  OF  IT.  WAS  IT  A  SEAT  'RESERVED  FOR  WOMEN'? (I don't know why there is such a seat in the first place)  BUT  NO; IT  WASN'T  AS  I  CHECKED  IT  BY  MY  FIRST  INSTINCTS.  NOW  I  AM  NOT  A  RIGID  BULLY  OF  A  BOY  AND  MYSELF  LEAVE  THE  SEAT  FOR  ELDERS,  BUT  GIVEN  THE  EXERTION  OF  THE  DAY  AND  THE  OBVIOUS  'NOT  OLD'  AGE  OF  THE  GIRL,  I  HUMBLY  REFUSED.  SHE  REPEATED  THE  SAME,  THIS  TIME  QUITE  HAUGHTILY,  AND  I  AGAIN  'HUMBLY  REFUSED'.  SUDDENLY  THERE  WAS  A  SCENE  AND  THE  'AUNTIES'  AROUND  STARTED  ON  WITH  THEIR  "ANTI-MEN"  COMMENTS  AND  SEEMED  TO  UNLEASH  ANOTHER  FEMINIST  MOVEMENT  IF  I  DIDN'T  OBLIGE.  NO  POINTS  FOR  GUESSING,  I  HAD  TO  LEAVE  THE  SEAT,  STAND  FOR  ANOTHER  17 KMS.  WITH  MY  BAGPACK,  and  WALK  2.5  KMS  TO  MY  HOME  AFTER  THE  LAST  STOP (yes..WALK). 

Now, I don't bear an innate grudge for this nor has this incident shaped my ideas in any way. I just wonder about the motivation (for lack of a better word) of women behind this and I could come up with the sole fact that A QUEST FOR EQUALITY IS CERTAINLY NOT THE ANSWER. At least not in the social world where there are so many instinctive misjudgements, blindfold hatred  and rageful misconceptions about men among women.

To conclude it all, I quote Kari Simpson where he remarks for women- 

"She doesn't know how much power she has and has to call herself something else; Does it help to be a woman? You bet."

SO  ALL  WOMEN  OUT  THERE,  SHINE  AS  YOU  MAY;  BUT  DON'T  TRY  TO  DO  THAT  BY  DESPERATELY  TRYING  TO  STEAL  THE  LIGHT  FROM  THE  "OPPOSITE  SEX"

SINCERELY,
THE OPPOSITE SEX

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